Have you been pushed to a point to leave your job? Office politics and peers are two known challenges to personally coping with stress.
Personal issues add stress into work environments, too. Those committed to adhere to a stress-filled work role require behavior strategies for compromising.
Stress coping strategies might challenge another core lifestyle role. Especially when values and morals are compromised.
Children model their elders in life experiences. They learn what their values, morals and beliefs are within their surroundings. Their ideas on handling conflict blooms from their culture. When people share stories about how conflict or violence shaped their success and failures it offers diverse opportunities in how to cope or strategize for managing stress. Conflict is personal but it reaps great rewards when openly discussed and resolved.
- Write down the the steps to conflict resolution listed below.
- Repeat aloud the rules for fighting fair.
These two steps facilitate retention of information for forming healthy habits.
3. Be creative!
Sass up something for a frame. Pin something within view. Create lists easy on the eye, yet readily available to refresh your communication habits.
4. Set aside a conflict resolution space that’s comfortable and invites a variety of posturing for diverse preferences.
Keep one area of your home or office for resolving conflict. Memories come attached with sensory experiences. With a conflict go-to place there is an inadvertent avoidance of peaceful settings (like your bedroom for quiet slumber or the couch for restful decompressing).
Pivot each success and failure towards a learning lesson on how to handle conflict in a healthy, non-violent manner. Share your stories! Sharing offers a variety of conflict-resolving cultures with stories poised on the results.
Steps to Conflict Resolution
- Communicate: Discuss and define the problem from each person’s point of view
- Brainstorm possible solutions
- Negotiate: evaluate and select the viable solutions
- Compromise: Choose a solution that is acceptable to both parties
- Act: Implement the solution
- Re-evaluate the solution at a later date
Rules for Fighting Fair
- Identify the problem – deal with only one problem at a time
- Focus on the problem not the person
- Take responsibility for your actions
- Don’t bring up the past
- Don’t use I statements
- No “fouls”: i.e. no blaming, put-downs, shouting, name-calling, “you” statements, swearing, interruptions, he said/she said, sarcasm, unkind tone of voice
- Be committed to resolving the problem
- Don’t hold grudges. If you’re not satisfied with the outcome, be honest and talk about it more
- Be willing to be wrong. Don’t take a position just because you need to be right
- Don’t be stubborn; be willing to compromise
- Pay attention to timing. Bring up the problem at a time when you and your partner would be receptive
- If the discussion is escalating, take a break; but decide on a specific time to get together and discuss the issue again.
- Listen! Take to heart what your partner is saying to you.
- Try to see the other person’s point of view
- Speak and act assertive. Try not to become defensive or offense; don’t take things personally. Both parties should be attempting to discuss the issue, not run away from or attack one another.
Peace Over Violence Curriculum, Healthy Relationships, In Touch With Teens Curriculum, Unit 6, December, 2012
GIG Design | Emotional Performance